Tax-Rebate Targets
Posted on: Thursday, 15 May 2008, 12:00 CDT
By Joe Blundo, The Columbus Dispatch, Ohio
May 15--A HOUSE
OK, $600 doesn't buy much of a house. And a $600 doghouse wouldn't really prop up the crumbing real-estate market. So the Flip Side urges you and 286.6 of your friends to pool your money and buy a house for $172,000, the average price in central Ohio in 2007. If everyone takes turns, you'd have to cut the grass only about once every nine years or so.
When the history of the 21st century is written, you, brave citizen, might well be remembered for shopping above and beyond the call of duty. For at least the second time since 2001, the president has called on Americans to go out and spend money for the good of the nation. But this time, he's providing cash -- in the form of a $600 income-tax rebate -- to do it with. But what would be the most patriotic way to spend it? The Flip Side suggests that you target a troubled industry or enterprise. Invest your check in the following:
A MANUFACTURED GOOD
Buying anything made in America would help the economy. The trick will be finding American-made items. They are so scarce, and gasoline so expensive, you could spend your entire rebate driving around in a desperate search. And that would mainly help whichever hostile nation provided the oil. Maybe you should just stay home and order $600 worth of pizza.
AN AMERICAN CAR
As you might have heard, General Motors lost 17 kajillion dollars last quarter. So buying one of its cars would be a nice gesture. Judging from recent ads, your $600 should buy you a late 1980s or early 1990s Chevy or Pontiac that "runs great" but has "some rust" and would make a "good work car" if you don't mind the "missing windshield" or the "family of raccoons nesting in back seat."
HILLARY'S CAMPAIGN
Money has been tight for the Democratic presidential candidate as she battles front-runner Barack Obama. Whether you want Clinton to be president or not, you might consider sending her your $600 just to keep the race going.
Presidential campaigns pump millions into the economy by buying TV ads, bumper stickers, yard signs, yellow caution tape and a lot of other stuff. Have you noticed that the economic slowdown has coincided with the crowded presidential field dwindling to just three candidates? Dennis Kucinich was propping up the economy all that time, and you didn't even know it.
AN AIRLINE
If any industry needs a boost, it's the airline industry. In fact, by the time you read this, the last airline might well have folded. So you really should use the power of social networking Web sites to pool your rebate with those of your friends and start an airline. How much would it cost? Skybus had $160 million in startup capital, so let's begin there: If you could enlist just 266,666 friends, you could probably establish America's next doomed airline.
OHIO
It would probably be silly to send a tax rebate from the debtridden federal government to the revenue-starved state government. Asking for tax money is widely regarded as unseemly by politicians anyway. But the governor would probably be OK with you buying 600 Keno tickets for $1 each (assuming that the new game starts as expected this year). To ensure that your money does the most good, try to lose. Your country needs you.
-----
To see more of The Columbus Dispatch, or to subscribe to the newspaper, go to http://www.columbusdispatch.com.
Copyright (c) 2008, The Columbus Dispatch, Ohio
Distributed by McClatchy-Tribune Information Services.
For reprints, email tmsreprints@permissionsgroup.com, call 800-374-7985 or 847-635-6550, send a fax to 847-635-6968, or write to The Permissions Group Inc., 1247 Milwaukee Ave., Suite 303, Glenview, IL 60025, USA.
NYSE:GM,
Source: The Columbus Dispatch, Ohio
User Comments (0)
RSS Feeds