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Wilkes-Barre, Pa., Times Leader, Jerry Kellar Column: No Runs, No Hits, No Game: Great, Adelphia

Posted on: Wednesday, 5 April 2006, 06:00 CDT

By Jerry Kellar, Wilkes-Barre, Pa., Times Leader

Apr. 5--"This is what you get for trusting people," I muttered to myself.

"You should have known better, fool." I said to me.

"No good, rotten sons …"

That last one was directed to the handful of customer service workers from Adelphia Cable who gave me the big-time runaround early Monday afternoon, the same time I had reserved for watching the New York Mets season-opener against Washington on ESPN.

Only, it wasn't on.

At approximately 12:59 p.m., somebody pulled the plug on ESPN. Instead of hearing, "Live from Shea Stadium in Flushing, New York," Adelphia subscribers were greeted with highlights from the NCAA Women's Basketball Tournament on ESPNews. Because I'm not one of the eight people alive who care about the women's tournament, this was not a suitable replacement for my Mets.

Thoroughly unhappy, I was determined to find the plug-puller, so to speak.

One week after writing all kinds of nice things about Adelphia and its commitment to the local sports enthusiasts, the company sticks it to me, one of its most loyal patrons.

Several calls to every Adelphia number in the phone book were met either with representatives who were only too happy to pass the buck to "the network," or phone receptionists who had no idea what the hell I was talking about.

"Programming?! We're only sales, sir," one person said. "You have to call the 800 number for questions or problems with your cable."

"I just did," I said, "and they told me to call my local office with complaints."

"I don't know what to tell you," the spokesperson replied.

"No s!@#$*&," I said softly.

Making matters worse, I couldn't even listen to the game on radio, because somebody in the neighborhood runs their scanner or CB radio 24 hours a day and it plays havoc with the reception. (You try listening to a ballgame while someone blasts a machine gun in the background.)

By now, I think the game was in the fourth inning, though I really didn't know for sure, what with the Sopranos living in my radio.

It wasn't until that night's SportsCenter that I found out Soriano was actually called out, and not killed, at home in the top of the eighth.

Finally, a third call to the corporate office produced a live person at the other end. Exhausted and weakened after enduring several minutes of trying to keep up with the automated prompts, I forgot what I called to complain about.

"So, what's the lineup tonight on QVC?" I asked cheerfully.

Of course she didn't know.

Alas, there is hope. A fellow Mets fan called with the news that DirecTV reached an agreement with SportsNet New York, which broadcasts more than 100 Mets games. Those games, he said, will be available on the dish, starting with tonight's game against the Nationals.

"That's good," I answered, "because I'm pretty sure my radio just said that Uncle Junior whacked Carlos Beltran."

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To read more columns by Jerry Kellar, go to www.timesleader.com [http://www.timesleader.com]

Contact Kellar at jkellar@leader.net [mailto:jkellar@leader.net] or 829-7243.

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Copyright (c) 2006, Wilkes-Barre, Pa., Times Leader

Distributed by Knight Ridder/Tribune Business News.

For information on republishing this content, contact us at (800) 661-2511 (U.S.), (213) 237-4914 (worldwide), fax (213) 237-6515, or e-mail reprints@krtinfo.com.

Unknown:ABC, NASDAQ-OTCBB:ADELQ, Tokyo:4744, NYSE:DTV,

Source: The Times Leader (Wilkes-Barre, Pa.)

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