September 5, 2008

Personality Test: Benjamin Taylor

The star who would play me in the movie version of my life and why:

Snoop Dogg -- he's the only person who could handle the role.

Childhood hero and why:

Chief Seattle. To me, he represents the ideal of man in his natural surroundings; the way we should all strive to be.

Pick your favorite captain:

A. Kirk

B. Kangaroo

C. Crunch

D. Jack Sparrow

G. None of the above, as none of those rookies will ever hold a candle to the Adm. Lord Nelson.

If the TV is on at 2 a.m., I'm watching:

Adult Swim on Cartoon Network.

Three people I'd love to have dinner with:

John Forte, Larry Ciancia, David Saw -- my three best friends.

After a long day, I like to relax with a:

A. Martini

B. Cold beer

C. Cabernet

D. Herbal tea

G. A nice refreshing glass of well water.

My quirkiest inherited trait:

Full body waxing.

Pick one:

A. "American Gladiators"


WWE -- there's no competition. People with the best sensitive humor always win.

My favorite sandwich, plus fixings:

I like gravy sandwiches with mayonnaise and butter or steamed kale and quinoa.

One word your mother would use to describe you:


Celebrity crush:

Michael Cera (in a totally platonic way, of course).

The oldest thing in my refrigerator is:

Marshmallow fluff from the Jurassic Period.

My required snack in a movie theater is:

I like catfish.

When I was 10, I wanted to be:

A ninja.

Exercise I hate most:

Any kind of abstinence (including abstinence from physical fitness).

Vegetable I won't eat:

There is none. I love vegetables.

I'm deathly afraid of:

Corporate globalization.

If I were auditioning for "American Idol," my song would be:

"Your Are the Sun, You Are the Rain" by Lionel Richie.

The first band I saw in concert:

My parents before I could remember.

The person I'm most often mistaken for:

I commonly get mistaken for Maya Angelou.

Choose one:

A. Dogs

B. Cats

A. Because packs are more humble than prides.

The worst advice I ever received:

"Better not risk it."

I own 1 pair of shoes. My favorites are:

Bare feet.

In high school, I was:


The most famous person I ever became friends with:

Fu Wei Zhong.

Choose one:

A. John

B. Paul

C. George

D. Ringo

B. Paul had the most fun.

My most recent eBay purchase:

Never bought anything from eBay.

Pick one:

A. "Ugly Betty"

B. "America's Next Top Model"

C. "What Not to Wear"

D. "Extreme Makeover"

C. I don't watch any TV at all, but I met the host on the street in New York City the other night. She told me that she didn't like my hat, but I sang her a song and she seemed to like that.

The movie that always makes me cry:

"Pollyanna,""Beauty and The Beast,""Fearless" -- I'm very sensitive to cinematic manipulation.

My most treasured fashion accessory is:

My invisible Hula-Hoop.

Pick one you love or hate:

A. Stripes

B. Polka dots

C. Plaid

D. Paisley

C. I am a Scotsman after all.

What you'll always find in my glove compartment:

Whatever you do, don't go in there!

My most embarrassing junk food:

Sometimes, I eat the wrappers on Starburst candies (by accident).

If I weren't a singer-songwriter, I'd be:

A teacher.

The last book I read:

"Thinking in Pictures" by Temple Grandin

It's not pizza without:


My favorite Web site:

Pick a Bond:

A. Sean Connery

B. Timothy Dalton

C. Pierce Brosnan

D. Daniel Craig

Like I said before, I'm a Scotsman.

If I could live my life as someone else, it would be:

My dog Goverdoodah.

My childhood nickname was:


My favorite "bad" movie is:

That's a tough one, as there is a lot of fierce competition.

My best karaoke song:

"Don't You Want Me Baby."

My first job:

Tower Records in NYC.

Pick one:

A. Ketchup

B. Mustard

Olive oil.

My favorite cable channel:

Unplugged network (when the TV is unplugged).

The song that always gets me out on the dance floor and why:

Pretty much any song, given the right mood.

Life would be better without:


If I could tour with any two bands, they would be:

Ben Harper and Citizen Cope.

I never travel without my:

Magic unicorn toenail.

Originally published by The Tribune-Review.

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