Cowgirl Wars, and Lots More

By LAURA CAPITANO

Today, a few Capibites — things too small to stand as a main course, but tasty fare regardless:

THE COWGIRL QUIZ

So I spent a lot of time lately on various cowgirls’ MySpace pages, trying to wrangle a female bull rider for my Sept. 21 column. Common among the pages was a 40-item country girl survey, listing the most divisive items facing rural culture. City slickers, peep this excerpt:

— Diesel or gas?

— Texas or Colorado?

— Ropin’ or Wrestlin’?

— Bed of your truck or a motel?

— Copenhagen or Skoal?

— Huntin’ or Muddin’?

— Bud or Coors?

— Drugs or Jesus?

— Mossy Oak or Realtree camo?

It’s true: A camo-print rivalry exists.

GIRL ON A HORSE

Mad Men’s second season has really played up Mrs. Betty Draper’s horseback riding hobby. How much longer before things get ugly at that stable? You know good things don’t come from equine side plots, from Gone With the Wind to the episode of Beverly Hills, 90210 where a middle-aged heiress tries to buy and sell Dylan as she does her horses.

IN A GARDEN NEAR YOU

The toys of my youth all seem to make their way back around, and limited edition 25th anniversary Cabbage Patch Kids are up for adoption ($39.99, plus an extra three bucks if you want to name your own Kid at cabbagepatchkids.com). BabyLand General Hospital is an actual place in Cleveland, Ga., you can visit, and the new Kids look much as they did in the old days. The same cannot be said of fair Strawberry Shortcake. They really tarted her up for the new millennium.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN . . .

Finally! The 1981 girly-cult classic Ladies and Gentleman, the Fabulous Stains is slated for DVD release today. Early-teenage Diane Lane and Laura Dern star, before they were stars, in this gritty little tale of a punk rock girl group and their rise and fall. Formulaic but so fun. Ladies, call your ladies, it’s time for movie night. The title would make an excellent double feature paired with Girls Just Want to Have Fun.

READ IT AND EAT

We, the fast food and doughnut lovers of this nation, all could learn a little something from Michael Pollan’s In Defense of Food: An Eater’s Manifesto. It’s a no-nonsense and approachable perspective on what processed foods do to the body and how and what to eat for health. Pollan supports real foods, too, no body- tricking diets or chemical-packed protein concoctions. He puts his mantra right on the book’s cover: “Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.” Makes more sense than this Cookie Diet I keep getting press kits for.

NO MUSIC, ALL THE TIME

How long is MTV allowed to keep the M in its name? The bulk of the programming has little to do with music as it is, and now the call was made to pull the TRL: Total Request Live video countdown from the lineup sometime in November.

OOPS, FORGOT ONE

Thanks to all who sent feedback regarding my Sept. 14 column about rock concert audience stereotypes. In particular, reader Yossi suggested a common character I clearly forgot:

OUT OF PLACE HIPPIE

OK, hippie, I know you’re “pheelin the groove” but your dreadlocks just whipped my girlfriend in the face, and your body odor is making the whole front section nauseated.laura.capitano@jacksonville.com, (904) 359-4370

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