Men Pair up Quickly After Divorce; Stems from Childhood Loss Says Dr. Bonnie
After divorce or the end of a long-term relationship, men tend to live alone for about three months before pairing up again. An article in the New York Times (http://nyti.ms/xROf0u) takes a look at some reasons why women seem to be happier than men after divorce. Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil suggests that men tend to think of themselves as the independent one on the relationship, “but what they often find is that they’re actually dependent on the woman in their life.” When that woman is gone, they begin the quest to find someone to fill that role.
(PRWEB) January 13, 2012
After divorce or the end of a long-term relationship, men tend to live alone for about three months before pairing up again. An article in the New York Times (http://nyti.ms/xROf0u) takes a look at some reasons why women seem to be happier than men after divorce – and the Pew Research center recently confirmed it’s easier for women to bounce back after divorce than it has been (http://bit.ly/yzL71H). Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil suggests that men tend to think of themselves as the independent one on the relationship, “but what they often find is that they’re actually dependent on the woman in their life.” When that woman is gone, they begin the quest to find someone to fill that role.
Though not always the case, men often “don’t know what they’ve got till it’s gone,” offers Dr. Bonnie. “They don’t realize that women do a lot of things which are integral parts of life, but which they take for granted.” Women tend to take charge of the social calendar, to nurture the relationship, to take care of a myriad of details. In this way, men need women but sometimes don’t want to admit it. Which can make being single after a long-term relationship that much harder.
“This comes from the wound they have from childhood,” explains Dr. Bonnie, “when they’re separating from their mother and learning to be masculine. But often this happens before they’re truly ready and into adulthood they continue to seek out women who can fill this nurturing void.”
While women naturally do better after a split, that doesn’t mean that men can’t rebound healthfully – and it’s imperative that they do, cautions Dr. Bonnie. “Since so many second marriages also end in divorce, they need to think especially hard before jumping right back into the relationship game.” Men should ask themselves what they want and need in their next partner to discover what, if any, voids they’re trying to fill. “Instead of spending energy after a breakup looking for the next relationship, men should take that time to work on themselves and how to grow as a person in the areas where they may have been relying on their partner,” says Dr. Bonnie.
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Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil’s best-selling book, Adultery the Forgivable Sin is being re-released under a new distributor and making its appearance available in eBook format and print on Amazon.com (http://www.amazon.com/Adultery-Forgivable-Bonnie-Eaker-Weil/dp/1587768151/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1321019076&sr=8-1). Adultery the Forgivable Sin was also made into a Lifetime Original Movie starring Kate Jackson.
Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil, PhD, is also author of the 2010 New York Times Reader´s Choice Award-winning book Make Up Don´t Break Up with accompanying DVD Falling in Love and Staying In Love. Dr. Bonnie counsels couples, singles, and step families. She works with those considering breaking up, people who have committed adultery, and couples who want to strengthen their relationships damaged by resentment or unresolved anger, teaching people to “fight” to increase passion, bring back magic and restore the sizzle. Dr. Bonnie teaches Smart Heart Dialogue along with communication and connection tools, and counsel´s families and children.
Named the Best Local Therapist by the US Commerce Association and known as “The Adultery Buster” and the “No. 1 Love Expert,” she is the best-selling author of other books like Finding and Keeping Love for Singles and Couples (Revised edition Feb 2010, including DVD How to Fall in Love and Stay in Love for Singles and Couples), Can We Cure and Forgive Adultery?, How Not to (S)mother Your Man and Keep a Woman Happy, and Financial Infidelity.
Dr. Bonnie is presently featured and available now on the Discovery Health/Oprah Winfrey Network documentary titled “Unfaithful” and A&E on addictions. ABC´s Good Morning America, a three-day series on NBC´s The Today Show, The Oprah Winfrey Show five times, a four day series on Fox TV regarding dating. She appears frequently on ABC, Fox, CBS and NBC News, The View, 20/20, and CNN. Visit Dr. Bonnie at http://www.DoctorBonnie.com.
For the original version on PRWeb visit: http://www.prweb.com/releases/prweb2012/1/prweb9100463.htm