Nothing to Hide — When the Child is Hungry, Feed Him, These Women Argue. Yes, Even in Public.

By Mary Powers /powers@commercialappealcom

It was just after noon on an unseasonably warm Sunday in November and Overton Park was starting to fill up as the mother and toddler settled on a shaded bench.

Behind them vehicles streamed down the hill past the Memphis Brooks Museum of Art heading toward the zoo.

About six feet in front of them, a half dozen patrons filtered up the sidewalk toward the museum entrance. The mother consulted briefly with a photographer who was trailing her for a photo project, then a few seconds later she was nursing her son.

During the next half hour, Amber Parmley would photograph Christi Stavely breast feeding her 17-month-old son Brent on that park bench, in a garden tucked beside the museum’s original

entrance and near the stone lions flanking the steps leading to the museum.

It was part of the “Project: Got Breast Milk,” Parmley and Nicole ‘Niks’ Hill launched nearly a year ago to support breast feeding by normalizing it.

Parmley’s now photographed more than 50 women breast feeding in homes, parks, restaurants, coffee shops, at a Memphis trolley stop and in Oak Court Mall.

Most of the sessions occurred in Memphis and Shelby County, but she’s also photographed women in California and Georgia who contacted her after hearing about the project.

“We hope to at least raise awareness about breast feeding. If that helps just a couple of people try breast feeding or feel more comfortable nursing in public, then we will have succeeded,” said Parmley, 22, of Germantown.

So far, the project’s resulted in a 2006 calendar. Parmley, who is a portrait photographer, provides the images. Hill provides the text. They are also working on a book.

“We didn’t like how society views breast feeding,” Parmley said. “We want to show moms nursing in public and help get the facts known about the benefits for the mother and child; that they don’t have to hide it from their family.”

Stavely, a Memphian, learned about the project from a friend and was moved to participate because of her experience breast feeding her four children.

“I am sick of people thinking I’m a freak. It is not abnormal to use your breasts to feed a child,” she said. “I’m very discreet . I think it is just the idea (of nursing) that makes people uncomfortable.”

The project sprang from the experiences of Parmley and Hill .

The women met through a local children’s play group.

Both got interested in breast feeding after reading about its benefits.

Both persevered despite early problems and family skepticism.

Both eventually got tired of withdrawing to the bathroom or car or a back room at home when their children were hungry and they were at the mall or a restaurant or had company.

“At the beginning, if we were out at the mall, I’d go to the car (to breast feed). I’m a very modest person, but eventually I thought, ‘This is ridiculous,’” said Parmley, who breast fed son Michael until he was age 2.

“At first I tried to put a blanket over my son’s head (while he was nursing), but he just screamed,” she said, adding the nursing clothes she wore provided modesty.

Hill, 22, of Bartlett, recalls her father once handing her a towel when she was nursing Gavin. He is now 13 months old and still breast feeding.

“I laughed,” she said. “My father said, ‘It’s not for him. It’s for the rest of us.’”

The women credit friends and La Leche League members with providing support and practical advice. The league is a nonprofit organization that provides breast feeding education and support.

State law specifically excludes nursing mothers from provisions targeting indecent exposure and public indecency.

On a recent morning, the women sat in Parmley’s Germantown studio and traded stories about snide remarks they heard while nursing.

“People would say, ‘Go do that somewhere else’ or ‘Ooo, gross,’” Parmley said. “It is not a sexual thing at all. Anyone who thinks it is, that’s just sick.”

Hill recalled the reaction of two women when she nursed Gavin at a local restaurant.

“They would point, stare and shake their heads. They were trying to make themselves known without making a scene.”

The reaction isn’t always hostile. No representative of a business or institution has ever asked them to stop breast feeding.

“We’ve had some people enthralled by it. I had an older man come up and pat me on the back and tell me how great it was I was” breast feeding.

To order a calendar or get information about the project, visit projectgotbreastmilk.comInformation about breast feeding is also available at lalecheleague.org.

– Mary Powers: 529-2383

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Breast Feeding Benefits

Health officials have set a national goal of getting at least 75 percent of mothers to try breast feeding in the days and weeks after childbirth and for at least 50 percent to still be breast feeding six months later.

In 2003, the most recent year for which statistics are available, nearly 71 percent of U.S. infants were breast fed at some point and about 36 percent were being breast fed after six months.

Here are some of the data behind those goals.

Breast fed babies:

Have less colic, constipation, diarrhea and ear infections;

Are at reduced risk for a variety of bacterial and viral infections;

May be at reduced risk of becoming overweight or obese in childhood;

May be less likely to develop childhood cancer, diabetes, allergies, asthma, eczema and certain other inflammatory diseases;

May benefit intellectually.

Breast feeding mothers:

Are at reduced risk for ovarian and breast cancers;

Have less bleeding after child birth and an easier time losing weight;

Are less likely to develop diabetes;

May benefit psychologically through reduced postpartum depression and greater infant bonding;

Save money because they aren’t buying formula and because breast- fed babies are typically sick less often, so mothers miss less work or school and are less likely to need medical care.

Sources: The federal Department of Women’s Health and Roberta Russell of the Memphis & Shelby County Health Department.