Living Clean And Sober And Needing A Little Help: Couple Quit Drugs and Alcohol for Their Children’s Sake

By Sukhjit Purewal, The Monterey County Herald, Calif., The Monterey County Herald, Calif.

Dec. 22–Each year, the Salvation Army gives the Herald the names of several dozen people who are working their way out of rough patches — financial, physical or emotional.

Reporters are supposed to turn the vignettes into the Operation Christmas Cheer series that appears in the newspaper.

But often people are hesitant to share their stories, or ask that their names not be used, preferring to keep their experiences anonymous.

Tina and Sam Murphy are just the opposite. If they could, they would shout their stories of recovery from the rooftops.

After difficult bouts with drug addiction, the Murphys are learning to live and function as a family. Sam, 49, has been sober for 11 months. For Tina, 28, it’s been 10 months.

“Life is really good,” Sam declares with a wide smile.

Tina and Sam met about six years ago, while both were in an earlier recovery period. There are no allusions in their home about a rosy outcome. The difference this time, both say, is that to hold onto to their children, Daisy and Anthony, they have to remain free of drugs and alcohol.

The couple was deep in the throes of addiction when Sam said he decided things had to change. He had lost his job with a medical supplies company, and they were left to feed Daisy, a toddler, and Anthony, Tina’s 8-year-old son, whatever they could get their hands on.

Daisy had started walking, but had nowhere to navigate inside the family’s cramped studio apartment in Seaside. Sam said he realized that his and Tina’s addictions were out of control and he hauled himself to a sobriety program. Tina followed his example, going to a shelter, then attending a program.

Today, the couple lives in a furnished apartment provided by the Homeward Program, an 18-month transitional living facility, one of several programs operated by Shelter Outreach Plus. The agency provides homeless people and families with transitional living facilities as they work toward finding permanent homes.

Tina, having grown up in foster care since she was 4 years old, said she has never known anything about proper mothering because she hadn’t had an example to follow. For her, drug abuse was a family tradition.

Now Tina is doing her best to be the mother she never had. She coos over Daisy as the child bustles into the living room pushing two strollers carrying baby dolls and hands one to Tina.

With the family making progress toward their personal goals, Operation Christmas Cheer can give them the boost they need to get over their financial hurdles.

Operation Christmas Cheer, an annual production of The Herald, the Salvation Army and First National Bank of Central California, distributes money to needy Monterey County families and people over the holidays.

Now in its 20th year, Operation Christmas Cheer has raised more than $1.7 million.

The money helps support the Salvation Army and is given to screened applicants who have turned to the charity for special holiday support. The money will be used this year to assist Salvation Army clients on the Peninsula and in the Salinas Valley.

Over the years, a sampling of those who have received help from the fund includes people who have unexpectedly lost jobs or homes, and working low-income parents who don’t have money to spare for extras such as Christmas gifts.

In the coming weeks, The Herald will profile several families needing help this year.

A special feature of the Operation Christmas Cheer campaign is that contributors, by using a coupon that will be printed each day on page B2, can have a brief personalized holiday message published in The Herald.

Click here to download the Operation Christmas Cheer coupon: http://www.montereyherald.com/multimedia/montereyherald/archive/cheer_coupon.pd f

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Copyright (c) 2005, The Monterey County Herald, Calif.

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