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Television; Don't attack Cartoon `Clones' just yet

Posted on: Thursday, 6 November 2003, 06:00 CST

Believe it or not, there are still some of us who think two really stupid movies have not totally destroyed the gleaming modern myth that is "Star Wars."

But even we defenders must admit that love is slowly turning to cringing ambivalence with each new "Star Wars" product. Heck, half of us went to see "The Matrix" and never came back.

Now here's "Star Wars: Clone Wars," a Cartoon Network miniseries of 20 three-minute animated "Star Wars" thrillers. (Starting tomorrow at 8 p.m., it will continue on an unnecessarily tortuous and bizarre schedule that won't end until next spring.)

Is that a thrill of excitement I feel? Or just a desperate hope that this will not humiliate me in front of friends, family and people who moved on to "Babylon 5"?

It's literally impossible to say. The Cartoon Network is so paranoid about bootleggers that it sealed all preview tapes in a block of solid carbonite for safekeeping. (Actually, a representative offered to bring a tape from New York on Amtrak's Acela, show it to us and then ride back home with it. That sounded cool, but it seems like something Darth Vader would make a PR person do shortly before blowing up his home planet in front of him.)

Fan anticipation on "Star Wars" Internet sites ranges from joy to fatalism. Part of the problem is, nobody's sure why the series exists, except that it will lure viewers into new Cartoon Network shows and make George Lucas imperceptibly richer.

The series includes the movie characters Anakin, Obi-Wan, Yoda, R2-D2 and C-3PO. It also introduces characters from the book series and video game that already bear the "Clone Wars" moniker, including the female Dark Jedi Asajj Ventress. The story is one long battle, picking up from the last "Star Wars" movie (the ludicrously named "Attack of the Clones").

It's fitting that there is a "Star Wars" cartoon, because the last two movies essentially have been cartoons, too, composed almost entirely of chilly computer animation. Ironically, this series consists mostly of hand-drawn animation - quite possibly the "Star Wars" franchise's first technological step backward in 25 years. It looks warmer (as seen on a video press kit), and the format harks back to the old cliffhanger serials that partly inspired Lucas.

The series is directed by Genndy Tartakovsky, who also helms "The Powerpuff Girls" and "Samurai Jack." The drawing style is similar - an unappealing sort of Hanna-Barbera/temporary tattoo hybrid. But Tartakovsky's other series are certainly interesting enough.

Well, the recent "Star Wars" movies certainly have lowered our expectations, and there's no way it can be as bad as that 1980s "Ewoks" cartoon.

Let's give "Clones" a chance and brace ourselves for the real looming trauma: "Episode III," coming summer 2005.

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