Eric Hopton for redOrbit.com – Your Universe Online
Google doesn’t just want your online life, your ad clicks, emails, and social network. It looks like the internet goliath wants to micro-manage your body odor, whether that is aromatic and heavenly or a pungent stink. We know this only because Google has lodged a patent for a proposed “fragrance emission” wearable device.
It’s a virtual nose
The device, if it ever sees the light of day, will incorporate sensors to monitor the wearer’s activity levels and their personal smell. When things get a little too pungent, the device will react by pumping out a fresher, cleaner, and less anti-social odor. Just the thing if you have ever been in that stress or exercise-induced “How are my armpits doing?” situation. You haven’t been there? Never suffered from the curse of filthy pheromones? OK— more for the rest of us.
It’s a people detector
Even Google can’t promise to kill the worst offending body odors, so our friendly internet giant has a back-up plan. The device will also search your social networks and let you know if there any of your contacts within stench-detection range so you can duck and dive to avoid embarrassment. How thoughtful of Google to give us a “route suggesting portion” which can “provide an alternate route to travel such that the predicted odor may not offend others that are socially connected to the user and that travel the same routes as the user.”
According to the patent, the device “includes an activity sensor, a communication portion, and a route suggesting portion. The activity sensor can detect physical activity of a user of a device. The communication portion may provide access one or more social networks via a communication network, in which the device may communicate with a social network of contacts.”
It’s a perfume pump and a camera
Apparently the planned device will consist of “a parameter detector configurable to select from a group consisting of an accelerometer, galvanic skin response monitor, a biometric sensor, an environmental sensor, a location-based sensor, context, and a camera.” It will have “a material dispenser operable to dispense a fragrant material at a future time based on a prediction signal.” In claim 6 of the patent, we learn that the “said material dispenser comprises one of a group consisting of a spraying device, a fan, and a heating device.”
It’s a medical record file and a sweat historian
Claim 6 tells us that the device will be able to dispense the replacement odor by using our “sweat history” and medical history. Users will be able to override the dispenser just in case you want to stay the way you are or possibly to deter someone from getting too up close and personal.
The future is Google and that future is perfumed.
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